hysterickingdom | [Action / Overlord's Castle]

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[Action / Overlord's Castle]

[By now, many people have no doubt seen plenty of the Prinnies that populate the castle, and many have no doubt seen how utterly lazy and ineffectual most of them are. Well, as of today, those Prinnies are getting a lesson.

There's a new face running around the castle now, shouting at and intimidating Prinnies like a real pro, commanding them not merely with simple fear. No, this demon was clearly someone who could stir up something in Prinnies... and those who refused their re-education were summarily beaten and dragged off. One might attempt to interrupt him on his quest if one so desired.

Later, in one of the larger halls, Valvatorez gathered damn near every Prinny in the castle; the ones who all needed education. Valvatorez leads the makeshift class, speaking loudly and clearly, with a commanding voice.]

I've seen the sort of work you pathetic lot do! I've seen Slimes do a better job of keeping rooms clean than you all, and you don't drip goop everywhere you move! Whoever gave you your instruction in how to be Prinnies has done the most slapdash and insufficient job I have ever seen! You all don't even bother to obey your Master, Etna, nor your Overlord without the fear of retribution!

[He flourishes his cape to the side.]

As such, I will be your new Prinny Instructor from this day forward. I will whip the lot of you into presentable Prinnies that will not humiliate your Master or your Overlord! It's going to be long, harsh, and brutal instruction... just as it should be with your kind. But know that if you perform your re-education admirably, there will be a bonus in it for you: a fresh, tasty, sardine. I will see to it personally that every one of you that satisfactorily completes my course shall receive one.

I am Valvatorez, your Instructor! And I make the best damn Prinnies in any Netherworld anywhere. You all will be no exception. Your lessons begin now! Repeat after me!

Prinny Rule #1: You will always include the word "dood" in all of your lines!

[...This goes on for quite some time. One might attempt to interrupt, or simply wait until the lesson is over to address the demon leading the class.]

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[Terra, wandering around the castle to get used to her surroundings, ends up following out of concern upon seeing one of those cute Prinnies dragged off. Poor thing, what did it do to deserve that? She quickens her pace, calling out.]

Stop! You don't need to hurt him!

[He doesn't really let go of the Prinny, who's only semi-conscious at best, though he does turn around at the odd act of mercy coming from someone.]

...You must be quite new to the Netherworld.

[It's not a barb, but a pretty plainly stated comment.]

This one is effectively a truant. And it's not like I did any lasting damage to him.

But you still hurt him! You didn't have to.

[She casts Cure, sending some healing magic at the poor Prinny.]

Yes, I'm new. I came through the gate, somehow.

[Still fuzzy on just how that happened, since she was unconscious at the time.]

[Valvatorez frowns when she heals the Prinny, but made no effort to stop her, either. He disapproves, but an act of selflessness like Terra's is one he grudgingly accepts.

...She would have done the same, after all.]

Because you are new to the workings of the Netherworld, let me explain why things are as they are, and why my use of force is justified.

I take it you do not actually know what a Prinny is? And what their role, duty, and responsibilities in the Netherworld are?

[Terra shakes her head.]

No, but why would that justify such harsh treatment? Couldn't you get what you want in another way?

I tried using verbal commands and warnings, but this one simply disregarded my orders, and therefore the Overlord's. When he refused, I did what is proper for a Prinny Instructor to do. Enact discipline.

It may appear harsh or unfair at first blush, I suppose, but what justifies it is who they are and why they are here.

Prinnies are the souls of sinful, corrupted, and generally foul humans given form after death. They have committed crimes against their own and the universe and are not suitable for reincarnation. As such, they must work, toil, and suffer to pay off their debts to the universe to return to parity and to purify their souls. For their fate to change, they must work and obey orders.

Otherwise they never move on.

Edited 2014-03-27 18:09 (UTC)

[Terra listens, curious about the Netheworld in general and Prinnies in particular, though she still doesn't quite look convinced.]

But...shouldn't they want to change? And what's the point making them go through with it if it's not their choice?

You would think that the situation alone would be enough to make them wish to change. Especially because I doubt anyone wants to be stuck in that form forever... but many do not bother to try. People do not so easily change, even when their bodies are taken from them. That is where some of us demons come in.

[Valvatorez sighs.]

But it is a choice. The very choice that many humans make in their lives. By turning to evil, by committing crimes and atrocities willingly against their own and the universe. People who have chosen that route because of their own free will are forced to reap the seeds they have sewn.

And it is often an arduous harvest.

[It certainly gives her a lot to think about. Free will is still a relatively new concept, but she's steadily more certain it's something others should have...even those who've ruined their own afterlives. Still, it seemed as though this individual is at least trying to help them, in his own way.]

I see....

What if I tried to help gather them? If they still came to you, it wouldn't matter if they weren't hurt beforehand, right?

[He pauses for a moment to think, but then smiled.]

That is correct. If they come willingly as per orders, they do not come to harm. And if you can get them to attend their lectures without force, that would be acceptable.

Just don't be too nice to them about it. This is their duty and they cannot be coddled.

[Perking up, Terra nods.]

I think I understand now. I'll do my best. Until this castle needs defending, I might as well make myself useful.

Excellent. The help is appreciated, considering this castle has a regular gaggle of Prinnies rushing about. Most of them are weak and stupid, so I doubt they'll try to fight you, but be prepared. Some of them might've grown some kind of spine.

If they did, feel free to smack some sense into them.

I'll give them every chance to stand down...but I can use force when need be.

[That's likely to be a very last resort with her, though there's something about her tone which might reveal that she's capable of more when push comes to shove.]

Oh, and if they get too uppity and you just want them to be dealt with? Just pick them up and throw them.

Be careful. They explode. Hospital can fix them afterward, though.

[Okay, that stops her short.]

They...explode??

Yes, human souls are... volatile, to say the least.

Try not to worry. Though they may be volatile and explosive if thrown like a grenade, a soul is a very durable, damn near indestructible thing. Patch up the outer shell at the hospital and they are quite literally as good as new. Only costs 1 HL, too.

I don't often throw Prinnies, however. I find other methods of discipline and combat much more effective. Besides, they don't do any work while out of commission, and that only slows down their reincarnation.

[So, so weird. Terra relaxes a touch upon hearing that the Prinnies survive exploding, but still looks unsettled at the notion.]

Good point. I don't think I want to see them explode, anyway. I'll find another way to help encourage them.

[After much consideration, Emizel finally did return to the castle...Not because he made up his mind to become the idiot Overlord's slave, but there had at least been shops from what he recalled inside, places hopefully to get supplies from while he was on his own. Needless to say, something already felt...off. Hadn't there been a few more Prinnies around last time?]

[Wait, he heard that voice. He knows that voice. It had to be..]

--Valvatorez? ['sup, just crashing in on your session. That sure explains where all the Prinnies left to though.]

[Valvatorez continued his lecturing for about twenty more seconds before he finally realized that was a familiar voice in an unfamiliar land. Once that finally reached his brain, he finally turned to its source, seeing that familiar young demon comrade of his.]

Oh, hello, Emizel. I wasn't expecting to see you here. Were you interested in sitting in on today's lesson?

[Swing and a miss, Val.]

[...So casual, how do you even do that.]

H-how long have you been here?! You're not actually staying here, are you?

[Yeah, this reunion is pretty awkward. Have fun having a reaper practically flail at you though, Val.]

[Comes with being a derp, of course.]

...Oh, since the troubles with the Gate started. And yes, I am. These Prinnies are a truly pathetic lot and need all the help they can get. I wonder if they had even been instructed at all.

Prinny Instructor?

[The book, held in the arms of a minion, raises an eyebrow as it peers in on this scene.]

I can't believe I've finally discovered a job worse than Prinny itself.

[Immediately after Zetta makes the comment, Valvatorez whips around right to face Zetta's prinny handler, and produces a heretofore unseen leaden sphere and flings it straight at the poor creature. The beanball hit squarely on the creature's beak, but whether or not the Prinny remained standing was another thing.

It did get the entire room to start sweating bullets though.]

I heard that, you little insect. You will speak when I allow you to in this lesson... and you will be scrubbing toilets for a long time for forgetting the VERY FIRST RULE.

[After all, who else would be talking?]

I'm not in your stupid classroom!

[The book promptly smacked his minion backwards by flipping open his rear cover, leaving him floating in midair with a fearsome glare on his face.]

Consider yourself grateful I found your antics amusing! I, the almighty Overlord Zetta, have little patience for violence against my minions that isn't comedic!

A book?...

[Valvatorez approaches Zetta, looking quite curious.]

Oh, so it was you, not the Prinny who spoke. Very interesting. And you said you were Overlord Zetta, the so called "Most Badass Overlord in the Cosmos?"

Quite a claim to make, especially considering no story about him mentions that he's a book of all things.

You'd be a book too if confining your soul to the Sacred Tome were the only way to save your life!

[Zetta draws himself up with supreme dignity.]

But my power hasn't slipped an inch! I'm still top dog around here!

[Valvatorez really doesn't look shaken or impressed at the display. Possibly because Zetta's still a book, and mostly because Val is largely unflappable in the face of powerful opponents.]

Yes, well. I would endeavor not to put myself in such a position in the first place.

I would think being a mostly inanimate object would make it hard to use most of your powers. [Not that he's making any threats, actually.] But pray tell, how did someone like you end up in such a situation? Seems unlikely that a "badass Overlord" would have to resort to Confinement to cheat death.

A coward or a fool tampered with the Sacred Tome! [That's his story and he's sticking to it.] Someone was afraid or unwilling to fight me directly, that's all! But the joke's on whoever it was. I'm still the best there is, even if I have to be a book!

Hm... coward sounds more apt. What kind of proud or noble demon would rely on some kind of booby trap to defeat their enemies? It doesn't prove anything, and certainly wouldn't make the one who did it worthy of the title of the defeated.

Hmph... traps. I remember all too many demons trying that on me back when I was a Tyrant.

[Yup. He sure did just say the big "T" word among demons.]

[Zetta is going to assume he means the little T petty despot word. Because the other option is unlikely madness.]

Exactly! But I'm still the most badass freaking Overlord in the cosmos! This whole 'book' thing is just a minor setback. Once I conquer a new Netherworld or two, I should be just fine.

Perhaps this is my ignorance of however this curse of the Sacred Tome works speaking, but how would conquering Netherworlds undo it? Especially if it was a coward's trap that cursed you to begin with?

Simple. I need to be able to create a minion with enough of my own mana power to write the wish in the Sacred Tome. To create a minion with that level of power, I need a Netherworld for the proper flow of mana to me again!

Hm, that sounds like it could work... though I can only imagine that using all of that Mana to get your original form back might weaken you considerably. ...It would be wise to make sure your minion is loyal enough to you not to take advantage of that.

Still, that sounds like an undertaking impossible with things as they are now. We very well appear trapped, no matter how strong we are.

My minions are merely extensions of my own power! They don't have the intelligence or self-will necessary to revolt against me!

And I've got no problem with conquering THIS Netherworld first if I have to. I'd be doing the place a favor!

Are you absolutely certain of that? Carelessness and hubris come before a fall. And as rough as you have it now, you still have lows to fall to. ...This is a lesson I know well.

[Tyrant to Prinny Instructor. Hell of a fall.]

I am sure the current Overlord would disagree. Not that it really matters to me one way or the other, so long as the Prinnies here are properly instructed.

...And so long as you leave Hades alone, of course.

Edited 2014-04-02 15:31 (UTC)

This is just a setback. [For all his many, many flaws, no one could accuse Zetta of pessimism or negativity. Bouncing back from this particular mishap is no trouble at all for him.]

Hades? You mean the Underworld? Seedle's domain?

[An admirable trait in any demon, and one Valvatorez could respect.]

No, not the Underworld. The Netherworld known as Hades, commonly known for having the greatest prison of demons in the Cosmos. It is tied heavily to Earth, and many Netherworlds worth of Prinnies pass through it for instruction.

Hades is my home. And I have much work to do there to straighten the place out.

[By the end of this little speech, Zetta is fidgeting slightly. He didn't really care about the history lesson...]

So long as it's not within easy reach to be conquered, I don't care about it. Right now, priority number one is to get my damn body back.

[Laharl was wondering where all his prinnies had gotten off to. He'd been suspecting maybe a secret drinking party, and is pleasantly surprised to stumble across the impromptu classroom.

He happens in on them towards the end of the lesson, and stays to observe from the doorway until Valvatorez has finished.]

Nice work. I think you might actually turn some of these good-for-nothings around.

[Valvatorez flashes something of a proud smile at the compliment.]

Thank you, Overlord Laharl. With time, I believe many of them will actually become productive... hopefully without resorting to more extreme measures. In all my four hundred years as a Prinny Instructor, never once have I had a total washout.

[He may not like to be thanked, but he really likes being addressed as Overlord, so it more than cancels out.]

Impressive, considering what you've got to work with.

You're free to use more extreme measures if you need to. You wouldn't want any of this lot to break your record.

[There's a dark, stereotypically evil chuckle that comes out of Valvatorez as he looks back toward Laharl's vassal Prinnies still milling about.]

You all did hear that, correct? I would advise that you do not force me to resort to those measures. Because I will, should you all give me reason to.

[The Prinnies promptly start sweating bullets again, as Valvatorez turns back to Laharl.]

It may take awhile, but I will see to it done. If you or their current Master have any requests about their training, do feel free to let me know and I will work it into the lessons.

[And you can practically hear the collective mental groan of every Prinny in the castle.]

I'm sure I'll have more... specific tasks in mind once you've beaten the basics into them.

Besides, with all you newcomers and the dimensional paths unusable, they should have more than enough extra work to do.

Hm, that is very true. Lots of housekeeping, lots of extra cooking, and plenty of extra latrine duty. Well, there certainly will be no excuse for having nothing to do.

And I am assuming there is no word yet about the Gate's troubles, either.

[The smirk fades from Laharl's face at that pseudo-question.]

Not really. She says she hasn't made any progress with it, but at least we haven't had anyone else come through in a few days.

Hmm. Small favors, I guess. Hopefully the lack of new arrivals will continue, then. Wouldn't be surprised if the Gatekeeper was one rude demand away from brutally murdering someone in broad daylight.

[Customer service work is hard, man.]

I've never seen her snap like that, but they do say it's always the quiet ones.

[Still, it's easier to imagine her murdering someone in their sleep.]

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[Action / Overlord's Castle]

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